


Memories

by Aubadeofapollo



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Flashbacks, Fluff, M/M, Wincest - Freeform, slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-14
Updated: 2014-10-14
Packaged: 2018-02-21 05:16:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2456147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aubadeofapollo/pseuds/Aubadeofapollo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean can't remember his own, but he enjoys reminiscing on Sam's toddler days.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memories

There were things Dean wished he could forget. But there were also things he wished he could remember. Some things he knew he was too young to remember but he couldn't help but try anyway. With both of their parents gone, he would never have certain memories. No stories told to him. No pictures. Nothing. He frowned in frustration.

~~~~~

_"Come here, Sweetie!" Mary cooed to her baby boy of almost one year. His beautiful green eyes flashed, showing that he knew she was speaking to him. John chuckled and fell to his knees behind Dean._

_"You can't expect to **will** it to happen, Mary." he said, smiling. He secretly wished he could as well, but knew he couldn't._

_"I can still be around as much as possible and encourage, John!" She retorted. Neither took their eyes off of their little blond child. Dean hiked himself up onto his hands and knees and speedily crawled toward his mother._

_"Hi there, Dean!" She exclaimed as she lifted him up into the air above her head and then back down, cradling him in her arms as he giggled and burbled. This made Mary smile all the more._

_"Oh John. He's so beautiful." She said. John hummed his agreement as he watched his wife and child._

_"Wanna go see Daddy?" She asked playfully as she set Dean down on his hands and knees once again and he raced off toward his father. She giggled as she watched John go from husband to new father._

_"Hey there, Dean-O!" John exclaimed. He lifted his son up and gently tossed him a few times into the air, like most fathers did, and catching him again. He repeated the process when Dean gave into laughing and flailing._

_After a couple more tosses, John brought Dean down and kissed his forehead._

_"My little boy. Can't wait to see the man you become." He whispered to himself, but Mary heard him anyway._

_"Hey! Let's try and help him walk again. Maybe he will have it today!" Mary said hopefully. John looked to her and chuckled at the determination in her face._

_"Alright. But don't be disappointed when it's the same result." John warned. So he set his son down on the floor and picked Dean's hands up with his finger and thumb, letting Dean clutch to them as tightly as he could. Mary placed herself closer to John and Dean and held out her arms._

_"Come here, Dean! Come to momma!" She cooed. John helped Dean tae the first couple of steps before he let go and Den stood there a moment before tumbling to the ground. He didn't cry out but John and Mary worried anyway._

_"He's alright Mary. Look. He's not crying or bleeding." John comforted as he picked his son back up._

_"Okay. Well, let's try one more time? I mean, you saw that! He stood on his own. We're making progress!" Mary pointed out. John nodded his head._

_"Yeah I saw. I suppose one more try wouldn't hurt." He said as he helped Dean stand once more. Mary held her arms out, beckoning and encouraging Dean forward once again. Before John could help him move, Dean let go and hobbled forward of his own accord and straight into Mary's arms. They both looked in astonishment as Mary held her arms around her little boy._

_"Oh my God! John! Dean just...! He just walked! He took his first steps John!" Mary couldn't contain her excitement and was almost in tears, she was so thrilled. John had a similar expression of shock and happiness, but without the tears._

_"I know, Mary! I was watching! He **let go** of me before I even helped him forward! I'm thinking he didn't want the help!" John exclaimed._

~~~~~

Dean couldn't remember the first words he said. He couldn't remember his first steps. There were no photo albums or pictures anywhere. But he did have certain other memories. Why have your own memories when you can have the memories for somebody significantly more important in your life. He had those for Sammy. He smiled to himself as he recalled Sam's first word and Sam's first steps; they happened in the same day. 

~~~~~

_John made sure his boys were nice and fed and cleaned before he went out the door._

_"Watch after Sammy. Don't let him leave your sight, alright Dean? And be in bed eight." John told him. Dean nodded and gave a "yes sir" as his father stepped out of the door and drove away to who knows where._

_Dean's attention was drawn by the little burbles of his baby brother who staring at him. Dean smiled._

_"It's okay Sammy. Daddy will be back soon. Daddy always comes back." He said to Sam. He just smiled at his big brother and fell backward onto the floor. Dean giggled and went over to help his brother back up._

_"Silly Sammy." He said. "Can't believe how big you are! It's only been a year." Dean said to his baby brother who was sucking on his thumb. It was true Sam had just celebrated his first birthday the previous week._

_Sam cooed and smiled at Dean. Dean couldn't help but smile back at his baby brother._

_Dean hoisted himself up and sat against the couch so he was still level with Sam. "It'll be harder to lose him this way." Dean thought to himself as he watched his baby brother play with his feet and tumble to the ground. Dean laughed._

_"I wish mommy were here to take care of us." Dean sighed. He desperately missed his mother. But he knew; something in him knew; she wasn't coming back._

_Dean was drawn from his thoughts about his mother by the cough of his baby brother._

_"You alright Sammy?" he asked Sam who was still fascinated with his own two feet. He watched as Sam's pudgy little fingers worked at his right sock and managed to get it off._

_"Silly Sammy." Dean said. For some reason, Sam heard and recognized his name and rolled around so he could crawl. Dean watched in awe as his baby brother stood up and began to shakily hobble his way towards him. His chunky little arms outstretched and a smile on his face, Den held out his arms instinctively and cooed encouraging words to his baby brother._

_"Come here, Sammy! Come to De!" Dean exclaimed. Sam slowly placed one shaky foot in front of the other but kept his eyes on Dean the whole time._

_"D... De. De! D... D... De!" Sam spoke. Wait. Sam spoke?! Dean realized that his brother was walking AND saying his name._

_"Wow! Sammy! You..." Dean began but noticed Sam took a wrong step and lost his balance. Dean dove forward and caught his little brother under the arms and pulled him close._

_"De." Sam said again. He then yawned and laid his head on Dean's chest. He curled his tiny hands in the fabric of Dean's shirt and closed his eyes. Dean just held him there for a moment. He had just witnessed his baby brother walk. He had also been present for his first word. He felt such pride and beamed. But then he remembered something; Their parents. His father should have been here to see it. His mother should have been here to see it. But they weren't._

_"come on Sammy. Time for bed." Dean whispered and he hiked Sam up, resting his head on his shoulder and carried him to their bed. He couldn't help but think about how Sam walked toward him but also called **his** name. Both, huge milestones for an infant and **he** was the common factor of them. His heart gave a strange flutter in his chest._

_He laid Sam down and managed to undo his fists from his shirt. He ran to his bag and changed into his pajamas as quickly as possible, knowing that if Sam woke up, he would be upset and Dean didn't want that. Not after all the happiness that night had offered. So Dean turned off all unnecessary lights and climbed in bed next to Sam. He pulled the sheets up just enough to where he knew Sam would be safe and warm. Sam cuddled up to Dean and balled his fist in Dean's sleep shirt._

~~~~~

"I love you baby brother." Dean said, eyes closed in his memories. He was plagued by thoughts of how their parents should have been the ones to witness what he did. But he was happy to be the substitute.

"Hey, De. Where'd you go?" Sam asked, pulling Dean out of his thoughts.

"OH! Uhh... Sorry man. Just reminiscin'..."Dean said distantly. Sam placed a chaste kiss to Dean's lips and brought him right back to reality.

"Well since you're doing that, come with me. Gotta ask you something." Sam said, grabbing Dean by the hand and leading him to the bed. Sam sat on the edge and Dean followed suit.

"What's up Sammy?" Dean wrapped an arm Sam's waist and pinched his hip. Sam jumped and made an indignant squeak.

"Dude, quit! You jerk!" Sam smiled.

"Bitch. Now what's your question little brother?" Dean asked again.

"So what do you remember of our childhood? There are things that I remember but things I feel like I'll ever know." Dean furrowed his brow at how Sam was thinking very similar things to what he was thinking.

"Like what Sammy?"

"Well... I know it sounds stupid. But, like... With Dad and Mom gone, I feel like I will never hear stories of my infancy. Like my first steps or my first word or..." Sam said He was about to go on when Dean cut him off.

"I remember those. I remember them really well." Dean said with a smile. Sam looked up and beamed.

"Really?! You... You can tell me those stories?!" he asked excitedly. Dean chuckled and kissed Sam's cheek.

"Yeah baby boy. It's actually one story. You took your first steps and said your first word in the same five minutes." Dean said.

"Come on Dean! Don't be a jerk! Tell me!" Sam exclaimed.

"I _am_ telling you!" Dean said as he pinched Sam's hip again. Dean may never know his own story, but he could make for damn sure that Sam knew his. He was more than happy to be the substitute that day. And somehow, he didn't feel like a substitute. He felt more like he was the principal person in Sam's life, even then.


End file.
